Joseph asked:


I lived in Out of state for three years and then to Peru for another three years and while I was there my grandmother helped me a lot with advise and just someone to talk to, for it was very rough. I missed her so much and sometimes I just set and tried thinking I’ll never see her again. I had no way back home and no money to talk to her as much as I wanted or needed to. So to move on I had to harden my heart and just work to make ends meet. Then in September she passed away so I came home in December thanks for my mom’s help. Yesterday was my grandmother’s b-day and my brother was devastated but yet I didn’t feel a thing and to be honest I forgot!! It’s like nothing seems to bother me any more, I want to blame it on all the hurt I went through and how I had to harden myself in order to work and not suffer. Now my family wants nothing to do with me because I have no feelings. it’s like my heart doesn’t change during crisis or lost of a loved one. BTW, she raised me and was much closer to me then my own mother. What can I do to suffer with my family in stead of being the only one that doesn’t shed a tear? Sometimes I have to fake it. Please help. thanks.

anonymous asked:


Hi all. We have been broke up now for a little over 2 months and she keeps coming around for some reason or another. Every time I plan anything with my friend she always try to get in between us. Some times I come home from work and she be waiting for me at my home “to talk”. Yesterday she came over and told me that her dad was really bad. He wants me to come over and pray for him and that I should be as a friend to him even if I did destroy his daughter’s life.
As a christian I want to go and pray over him and spend some time with him but I’m so afraid that they (my ex’s parents) are going to ask loads of questions that I won’t feel comfortable about answering. Please give me advise as to what I should do and if it is to go how can I avoid the questions without being rude? (I live in Peru by the way) so if you know the peruvian customs that would be a lot of help.
I forgot to add, we were in a ralationship for over 2 years and so I because really close to her parents.
Which makes me more scared to go because they try to make me feel bad for what I done to their daughter.

Ashley A asked:

Ok so my grandmother has come from Peru to visit me and I am very guilty about that because I have been ignoring her and been too busy with friends. I want to spend time with her because back in Peru she took care of the whole family and its businesses and also she has osteoporosis in her butt,back, and neck. and i just feel horrible for her leaving her home and family to be with my and my small portion of family. She’s an amazing women too she inspires me and I find it incredible how she can live her life so well living with all my family’s problem and osteoporosis. The thought of that and her dying makes me cry oh so much. I want to spend sometime with her but my friends always have me booked and also i find it kinda embarrassing. The language barrier also makes it difficult to even talk to her, how would i be able to spend time with her and how can i explain this to my friends, cus they would find it odd. And also wat would u reccomend we do shes 73, I’m 13.

Ally asked:

this is a long story, so bare with me. if you end up reading my whole story and answering, thank you immensely.

When i was 7 years old, my dad left. I don’t know what made him leave. i remember sitting with him on the couch the night before he left, and he told me that he was going on a business trip for 10 days. he promised he would be home on the tenth day. however, after the tenth day, he didn’t come home. he remained in mexico, working. he was a rock minor, had mines set up everywhere, mainly in peru, and south america. that was one of the only trips i remember disctinctly. but i do remember picking him up in the airport a few times when i was younger. i dont remember how my mom and dad acted toward each other, but i do recall sitting in the car on the way home from the airport, my parents yelling at each other. my dad said “Drop me off and ill catch a flight back to mexico”. my mom tells me that my dad called often, i only remember talking to him twice, but i was 7, i cant remember things too well. he didn’t come home, not after 3 months, 9 months, 1 year or 2. when i was 9 and in 4th grade, we got the news that my father had died from a heart attack. i hadn’t seen him in 2 years, and he died. of course, i burst into tears, but thinking back, how was i supposed to react? i hadn’t seen him in 2 years. and please answer this: Can a business trip really last 2 years? and we were well off, so its not like we couldn’t afford a trip home for a few days. was what he was doing in mexico really worth the 2 years? and i ask my mom now if they were getting a divorce, she denies it. he died in september 2003. in this upcoming september he will have been dead for 6 years. i won’t have seen him for 8 years. i am currently 14, turning 15 in july.
this all happened a long time ago, but it keeps haunting me. this is where it gets worse.
i remember as a child walking downstair while my dad was away. i looked into the living room and saw my mom and her friend ross, kissing. i was young, and when i asked my mom about it(back then, and recently) she denies the affair. i’ve always known that i was right, because i saw what i saw. anyways, a few weeks ago/1-2 months ago my mom was out. she left her computer on, so being a snoop i read her e-mails. they were dated in 2002, while my dad was gone on his long trip. they were e-mail from ross, they were talking about how they had *** in the computer room and other places in my house. he said how they didn’t have *** in my moms bed because when my father returned he might be able to smell ross’s after shave. they were talking about how he wanted to wrap his “toungue around my mothers c-” and yes, the “c-” word wasn’t continued. i think i know what he meant.
so my mom cheated on my father, if the emails are correct. they match what i saw.
when i read these e-mails i was so pissed off and angry and sad that i left the house for 6 hours. i simply walked around my city for 6 hours. i kept saying to myself what a bitch, a **** and lying cheating ***** my mother was, for her to do something like this to MY father.
now, i don’t know what kind of man my dad was. whether or not they were fighting, or maybe my dad deserved it.
but the thing is, is that im from a well off family, i live in a wealthy city and im not like ghetto trash or anything. so this, for me is weird.

i am so depressed, all the time, because everytime i look at my mom, im angered.
and my mom randomly brings up the fact that her and ross were in love when they dated a year ago(theyre broken up now). i have to hold myself back from telling her i know about the e-mails, everything.

i don’t really know what im asking for from you guys…maybe some answers to the following questions, or some reactions/opinions to my story.
my questions:
why would my dad leave us for 2 f*cking years?
is it possible that my dad is still alive somewhere?
how do i deal with the whole e-mail thing?

today is fathers day, and while everyone is celebrating with their dads, im stuck, home alone, while my mom and sister are at my sisters horse riding lesson(shes 17).

whenever im not around my friends, and just my mom, i totally shut up. im silent, dont ever start the coversation, my mom usually gets mad. she asks me what wrong, but i just say nothing, because i cant let her know.
the death of my dad still depresses me, every day. im a totally different person when im not with my friends.

but yeah, so thanks for listening to my story. thanks for answer/opinions/help/reactions, everything.
help.

Jason F asked:

There is no other or better way to write this question.

Here are the facts:
I am still living with my mother at 24 years. She divorced my dad back in ’89. She has been a cop for 10 years. She insults my dad, who never cheated on her. My dad has faults, but he is a fantastic father. She cheated on him.

I am also born with a physical disability if that has any affect on why she treats me like crap.

Growing up and now, she would always shut me out and ‘prefer’ my brother over things, even though he was a major problem child growing up. She always picks on me and uses me for her jokes whenever she is with friends or at a family gathering. She lets my brother shine while I am the ‘fall boy.’

I also have a sister (half sister, who is my mom and step dad’s (the guy with whom she cheated) daughter, who I love to death.

She would get really pissed off if I did something (like miss the bus by accident in high school). She never respected me and the choices I made (I went to Peru for a year. I am now fluent in Spanish and I plan to use that for a future job). She gets in rages and I can’t live in this house no more. I am a college senior and ready to graduate.

Is it me? Or is my mom crazy? I don’t buy the crap that some cops forget to switch off while they’re at home because she has always treated me this way, even before she became a cop.

For those of you who could understand what I wrote—-can you tell me what my situation is???

Thank you for your help

guess whO! asked:

Today they told me to go to church with them and then to go with them for my mom’s haircut. But i didn’t really want to. Automatically they start yelling at me, saying Im rebellious, wanting to do “whatever I want” with my life instead of obeying them (and how perhaps it would be best if I moved out of the
house if I don’t agree with their upbringing)
**we are from Peru. Im 22 and came to the US at 7 (so most of my life I’ve been here AND my way of thinking is a mix between both cultures, not just traditional peruvian) My older sister is 32 and the perfect daughter. She never left home before getting married and she does everything and anything my parents tell her (no exaggeration). On the other hand, Im the disobedient one (who is graduating as a biology major in May and is going to persue Medical School, who volunteers weekly at 2 different places. ALSO: THEY SAY THAT I HAVE CHANGED SINCE DATING MY BF OF 1 YEAR. i say that its not him but the natural processes of aging…
=’( help
this is just today’s example.. it goes on many times a week but since I’m on winter break from school, I get to hear this daily. Also, I commute to school so it’s not like I get to just avoid it all in a few weeks.

I just want to know if I’m going crazy and if in fact it’s my fault. My parents are TOO MUCH into the “family is #1″ and I believe it too but I think they exaggerate that idea. They think that I am such an “american” that I believe in individualism too much. They even say that probably when I become a Dr and get married, that I will live far away and not really contact them. (as opposed to my married sister who sleeps over literally almost everyday in my house with her husband)

…geez =( I don’t know what to do. (plus my sister is so disrespectful to my boyfriend who at 24 is also persuing med school and works doing cancer research and loves me so much… there is no reason to not like him, atleast to treat him with respect.

so yea, thats my life at the moment…
also THANK YOU SO MUCH everyone for taking your time to read my long story here…

i talk about it with my bf and my best friend but perhaps they are biased. I really appreciate all your comments.

Mollster1501 asked:

My auntie from peru is leaving on the 29th, and I intend to get her a build-a-bear!!! I am completley broke and have no money, and need an easy way of getting money QUICKLY so I can order it all online. I can’t do jobs at home, that wouldn’t work with parents.

May I add – I’m 10 years old

Molly

**~sweetkittykatly~** asked:

so i was abandon at 6 moths and set off seas to peru for 5 years than reunited at 5, and 4 other times before ive turned 18 becasue thats when i left home and moved out.

now im 22 and have a son thats 10 months, and cant help but do the same thing to him as if it was instinct. i have to do improvements on my life and im leaving the state to a better job leaving my son with his dads mom, so…wtf?
basically im not going o see him becasue me and his dad are splitting up and im permitly moving to anather state.
my family even though they abandon me recently theyve came back to my life and i cant believe i actually care about what they might think.. theyve done it to me but i dont “intentionally” am rying to abandon my son, its just somethining i have to do.

but why do i care about there opinions? why?
its not that i want to leave him, i just dot have the finacial means to take care of him ok,
i wish i did have them but i dont, plus im going to be staying with someone for the mean time and i cant have a newborn there with me, its better for my son, im not a bad person, just the circumstances are like they are you moron

oceania112 asked:

when i was 6 months my mom sent me to peru with my aunt till i was 4 yrsold. (btw she kept my sis which was 6 at the time). she blamed my dad because he kept pushing her to do it because she was getting her citizenship and was working.

basically i was bounced around for many yrs including my teenage yrs which everytime lasted for almost 2 yrs. ive been to peru 5xs and stayed there without my family for almost 2yrs. my mom always treated my older and younger brother diffrently than me,like she loves them more.

anyways i have a 4 month old son and living with my 33 yr old bf and his mom. me and my bf dont get along like we used to,hes always ignoring me, calling me names,hes so jelouse, he hates seeing me happy all he wants is for me to stay home. w’ve been together for 4yrs ever since i was 17.i dont think he wants to marry me although he say later on which feels really like an excuse. i feel defeated when im with him and want t leave him. i went to the woman shelter 1x with my son and it was so hard for me, because the responsibility was so much that i came back.

i feel like my son is better off with his grama and dad for the mean time till iget my liscense,job,place.
i want to get back with my ex, he makes me feel so alive and hes so smart, he wants to marry me , get me a car, he wants me to go to school, he wants the best for me, he says later on we can get my son back from his dad once i have all that..the thing is that my ex lives in anather state.
i want to leave so badbut im ashame what my famil may think, i mean my mom has done it to me so why should i care what they think.

should i care? plus shs not like a motherly person, she doesnt know me a daughter rather than someone that she gave birth to even thugh she trys to hide it.

laughing_stock asked:

she’s going to peru tomorrow and my mum works 9 – 6 every week to support us. I am unemployed and everyday I’m always busy going out to network and contact relevant employers. Sometimes I get volunteering work which involves unsocial hours and the industry I’m working in involves unsocial hours anyway. my mum says that I’m being selfish because I’m not helping her with the farewell party to Peru cooking and that she had to cook the meals herself for the guests and she blames me that I should have come home earlier to tidy up the house. It’s not my fault that I’m busy networking and working voluntary to get to a career that I want. My mum divorced my dad when I was a teenager and I used to help her with housework and food shopping etc. so she doesn’t have to, now I have responsibilities of my own she tells me how selfish I am that I’m not helping her. I told her I’m busy. she says busy with what? networking and voluntary work that you’re not gonna get paid for? she reckons that I could get a paid job so I could help her rather than voluntary work. I had to even call in sick which I’m not alowed from voluntary work that i’m doing to help my sister tidy up the house for her farewell party. then she complains that I don’t tidy up properly. she says voluntary work is a waste of time because she says that I’m spending money more on food and transport. i get JSA to support me. my mum also said call in sick for work so that I can help her at the lauderette she owns and when I come home at 10pm I asked my mum what food she cooked. she said she didn’t cook because she came home at 7pm cos she was tired and that I was selfish to ask that question because I expected her to cook. she says why I would want to work in the events industry because it’s hard work when I could take over her launderette. I said it’s gonna be a waste if I don’t work that related to my degree. she say well she has a law degree and where is she now working at a launderette, you know not everyone works in the industry which they did a degree for so don’t expect too much from the degree you did.

I told her that I want to work as an internship in america she says who’s gonna look after me then in london and what if you leave keys at the flat in america and not bein able to get in. I used to leave my keys when I was in my teens but now I’m more responsible but she brings it up because she doesn’t want me to leave her. what if this and that. my sister looked at my mum’s savings and didn’t have a lot of money and she blames me and says do you not care that mum doesn’t have any money in her savings. how is it my fault. why is it that my sister’s allowed to go travelling and i’m not
my voluntary work is the best option to get into my future career.