My story:
About 20 or so years ago, when i was still a young lad traveling the world, I had at this time been preoccupied with searching for the fountain of youth. Certain legends and artifacts had led me to believe that the said fountain was hidden somewhere in the slopes of Machu Pichu, Peru. Traveling here I spent about 7 months, gaining nothing but some old clay pots and three or four wives.
Fully frustrated, I packed up my archaeological equipment and began my long trail home. However, while walking over on of the ancient abodes, a loose patch of ground collapsed under me. This patch, however, was covering a large catacomb, and I plunged through the centuries-old opening. My foot caught in a rough patch on the rock walls, flipping me upside down. In the whirlwind of movement I felt a sharp pain on my right temple, and I was knocked unconscious.
I do not know what time it was when I next awoke; it was very dark in the catacombs, and there was no view of the sky. In the confusion it never occured to me to check my wristwatch. After a few moments my eyes began to adjust to the dark, and I could see general things, for the most part. The only thing I could not discern was a large shape that was directly in front of me. Trying to discern it, I nearly died of fright when the object moved. Suddenly, around me many lit torches conjured themselves from nowhere. The moving object – now fully illuminated – was then glared from me, as my eyes now had to adjust to the bright firelight. However, when I could see it again, I was shocked with disbelief – for the object was a llama!
Seeing my conspicious state of inner pandemonium, the llama tried to elucidate the situation; however, this only antagonized me more. The llama spoke in an ancient dialect, loosely translated means: “Yo boi get outta dis hood before I busta cap in yo cracka ***.”
Reverting to my basic survival instincts, I began looking for a way out of the catacombs. I said: “I’m feel more helpless like the actor who played the Afro guy from That 70′s Show!” Whereas the llama replied: “Dang boi are you stupid or someting? He’s the dang Geico caveman now dang boi get out here!” Whereas I was swept up by a mysterious wind, which brought me back to the surface.